The Two Most Important Words in Law Firm Customer Service Only When Done Right

If you run a law firm, your client retention doesn’t hinge on your legal strategy alone. It hinges on how you make people feel—especially when things go sideways.

Every practice has moments where cases stall, mistakes are made, or clients get scared, confused, or even angry. When those moments happen, your next words matter more than anything in the case file. In fact, they might be the difference between a retained client and a 1-star Google review that never goes away.

We’re going to talk about two deceptively simple words that, when delivered at the right time and in the right way, can transform how your clients perceive your firm.

Those two words? “I understand.”

But they only work when they’re done right.

The Problem: Why Law Firms Lose Clients During Emotionally Charged Moments

A colleague of mine recently shared a story about his son, who’s in a client-facing role in a high-end service business. He was on a Zoom call with a group of people from a major account. Things went wrong with the setup, and his son—normally one of the most emotionally intelligent and skilled people in the room—accidentally said something that made the client group feel like the problem might be on their end.

Technically, it was. Their equipment wasn’t compatible. But that didn’t matter.

Once the group picked up on that implication, a kind of herd mentality kicked in. What started as a mildly frustrating call turned into a full-on client loss. And there was no pulling it back.

Why? Because the emotional tone had shifted, and nobody in the group felt seen or validated.

You can have the best service, the most facts, and the strongest legal case in the world—but if the person you’re talking to feels dismissed or blamed, the trust vanishes instantly.

Common Mistakes Law Firms Make in Client Complaint Handling

Let’s start with the one phrase that seems helpful on the surface but often falls flat:

“I’m sorry.”

Most people don’t want an apology—they want a resolution that feels fair and personal.

Most people don’t actually want an apology—they want a solution. “I’m sorry” can come across as lip service, especially when it’s delivered automatically or without any real ownership. Clients can feel when it’s being used as a deflection or as a way to quickly wrap up a difficult conversation.

There are moments when a genuine apology is appropriate—especially if the person handling the situation was directly responsible for the issue. But that’s the exception, not the rule.

The default use of “I’m sorry” doesn’t build trust. In fact, it can create more frustration if the client interprets it as a scripted response or a way to avoid accountability. Instead of helping, it can feel like you’re just trying to pacify them and move on.

A better approach is to combine empathy with action. Don’t just apologize—align with the client, and then move toward resolution.

Let’s explore other ways that firms tend to get customer service wrong—often without realizing it.

Here are two common (and costly) mistakes:

1. Skipping empathy entirely and jumping to defense mode Responding with facts before feelings is one of the fastest ways to lose trust.

Client: “I wasn’t told there would be additional fees.” Staff: “It’s in the contract you signed.”

That might be technically true. But it sounds dismissive and combative. What the client hears is, “Your feelings are irrelevant. You should have known better.”

2. Offering an empty apology or robot-speak Canned responses make clients feel like they’re speaking to a script, not a human.

Client: “This isn’t what I expected. I’m really upset.” Staff: “We’re sorry for the inconvenience. We value your business.”

This generic corporate script lacks humanity. It doesn’t meet the moment, and it certainly doesn’t help. If your team could copy/paste the line into a hundred emails and it would fit all of them, that’s your clue: it’s not personal enough.

The Right Way to Handle Upset Legal Clients: Using “I Understand” Correctly

“I understand” is only powerful when it signals empathy and leads to meaningful action.

The phrase “I understand” becomes meaningful only when it is said with real empathy and is immediately followed by the next best step toward resolving the issue—or at least a clear plan to research it and figure out how to make it right.

Here’s how it sounds when done right:

“I understand.” (Short pause.)
“Let me make this right. I’ll personally make sure you get a call back within the hour.”

It’s not just about the words. It’s the tone, the timing, and the truth behind them.

So how do you make the client feel like you’re on their side—especially when things are tense?

You start by removing any hint of blame. You communicate from a place of alignment, not authority. You signal that your goal is the same as theirs: a fair resolution.

Say things like:

“You’re absolutely right to expect better from us.”
“I’m on your side here, and I want to help get this fixed.”

These aren’t magic words, but they frame the emotional tone of the conversation. They lower the client’s defenses and shift the dynamic from adversarial to collaborative. And that shift is where real trust is built.

In legal practice, this can literally be the difference between keeping a long-term client and losing them to a competitor who “just felt easier to work with.”

Why Better Client Communication Prevents Negative Reviews and Builds Loyalty

Clients are more likely to forgive mistakes if they feel understood in the moment they’re upset.

When law firm teams get this right—when they treat upset clients like people having a human experience instead of a problem to manage—you get fewer escalations, fewer lost clients, and far fewer nasty reviews.

Not because you fixed the problem instantly, but because you showed emotional intelligence in the moment.

It doesn’t matter if you call them “clients” instead of “customers.” Let’s be honest: the term “client service” sometimes feels like it comes with a salesy undertone. So for the sake of clarity, we’re calling it what it is: customer service.

And great customer service requires emotional control. When things go wrong, your team has to lean on three words internally:

Patience. Tolerance. Acceptance.

• Patience with the process of hearing someone out.
• Tolerance for emotions that may not seem fair or rational.
• Acceptance that these moments are a normal part of running a firm that serves real people with real problems.

Nobody wants to have these conversations. But they’re a part of the business. And if you learn to handle them well, they become opportunities to earn trust.

Side Note: It Even Works With Your Spouse or Significant Other

If you’ve ever had a tough moment at home, you already know this:

Saying “I understand” can change everything.

Not “I understand you’re upset.” Not “I understand but…” Just: “I understand.”

When your spouse is overwhelmed, angry, or hurt, and you offer those two words without trying to fix anything immediately, something shifts. It shows that you’re with them. You’re in it together. And most of the time, that’s all they really needed.

The same is true for your clients.

Training Yourself and Your Team to Stay Calm During Heated Client Calls

Even with the right words, delivering them with the wrong energy can undo everything. If you or your staff struggle to stay calm when conversations turn tense, it’s not a matter of willpower—it’s a matter of training.

Remaining professional under pressure starts with one critical mindset shift: don’t take it personally.

That upset client isn’t angry at you—they’re angry about their situation. And when you remind yourself of that in the heat of the moment, it becomes easier to respond with clarity instead of defensiveness.

Here’s how to train for those moments:

• Recognize the heat. When someone is venting, don’t escalate by matching their energy. Breathe. Pause. Listen first.
• Repeat the mantra: Patience. Tolerance. Acceptance. Remind yourself throughout the call that your job is to guide—not react.
• Stay on their side. Literally remind yourself mid-conversation: I’m on this person’s side. My job is to help them, not argue with them.
• Focus forward, not backward. Rehashing what went wrong rarely helps. Shift the conversation toward what can be done next.

You can even role-play these scenarios with your team. Practice recognizing emotional cues, staying calm, and redirecting the conversation to resolution. With time, your team will learn how to defuse even the toughest calls and preserve the client relationship.

Using AI to Improve Law Firm Intake and Client Experience

Not everyone on your team can stay calm under pressure—but your technology can.

The reality is, not every intake specialist or front desk person can stay calm when things get heated. And not every firm has someone available 24/7 who knows how to say the right thing at the right time.

That’s why some attorneys are turning to Legal Navigator AI.

It’s not just a call answering service. It’s an AI intake agent that also happens to be really, really good at customer service.

It doesn’t get flustered. It doesn’t get defensive. And yes, it can even handle profanity without skipping a beat. Best of all? It knows how to set the stage for a real, productive conversation with your team—so that when your staff takes over, the client is calmer and more open.

Sure, some people will still insist on talking to a real person. But the AI can frame the tone of the call in a way that makes the next step smoother, not harder.

That kind of emotional steadiness is something every firm needs—especially in a world where the next Google review could be the one your next referral client reads.

So the next time something goes sideways, ask yourself:

Have we built a team—or a system—that knows how to say, “I understand”?

Because those two words, when delivered with empathy and follow-through, help turn tense conversations into trust-building moments. And trust is what keeps clients coming back—and referring others.